Should You Play Pickleball With Your Spouse? The Good, the Bad, and the Awkward

Because nothing tests a marriage like mixed doubles

The other day we were playing with Jim and Angie, a 50 something couple with decades of marriage, and as they walked on to the court, Angie said “the only things I want to hear come out of your mouth are, good shot, nice try, and the score. That’s it.” And this approach worked wonders for them, they’ve played as well as a team as I’ve seen them play in months.

Playing pickleball with your spouse can be one of the most fun, frustrating, and rewarding activities you do together. On the bright side, it’s a great way to stay active and share some laughs, but it’s not all perfect shots and high-fives. Playing with your partner can bring out the good, the bad, and the “are we really doing this right now?” moments. Tensions can sneak in faster than a tricky dink, especially if a rally goes awry or someone gets overly competitive. That’s when communication becomes your best friend. Being honest and kind about how you’re feeling helps keep the game fun instead of frustrating.

So, if you’re having a rough day or a shot just isn’t falling, a quick “Hey, I need a minute,” or “Let’s keep it light today” can make a huge difference. It’s all about trusting each other that the goal is to have fun, stay close, and not turn the court into a battleground. The best part? A little honesty and humor can turn even the most "bad" shots into shared laughs.

And don’t forget about taking breaks. If frustration, fatigue, or a bit of stubborn pride start creeping in, step back for a moment, and if it’s open play, wait to rotate in with a new partner. Sometimes a game or two apart, can be all you need to get back in the groove. Or maybe a longer break is needed. Remember, it’s just pickleball so unless you are on the pro tour together, you should keep an eye on the big picture.

I can be pretty competitive and hard on myself when playing. This does not mesh well with Joyce’s interest in having fun, sure she likes to win, but doesn’t get tweaked like I do sometimes. So to make sure we are on the same page, when we step on the court together, I’ll remind myself we are there to have fun, and that keeps me centered and able to work as a team.

When you focus on the shared fun, celebrate your partner’s good shots, laugh at those hilarious misses, and stay supportive, playing pickleball with your spouse becomes more than just a game, it’s a chance to grow closer while having a blast. Keep communication open, take those well-deserved breaks, and remember to enjoy every moment on the court. That’s what makes it all worth it.